Boxer and Socks with Suspender
by no halo angel
Summary: Genderbender of Panty and Stockings. While some aspects are different like the main characters are switched. Other's like the ghost and Chuck are the same. I kept chuck because he's chuck. This is what would be different is Panty and Stocking were guys. Hope you enjoy the adventures of Boxer and Socks.
1. Heaven's Angels

The bell rings signaling a heavenly message. Boxer and his lady friend are woken up. "What the hell is going on?" she ask covering herself with the sheets.

"Ah fuck" Boxer says with a groan. He throws the blanket back over his head.

Socks gets up from the sound but slowly gets back down not giving a fuck.

Suspender stands there waiting. When she figures they aren't coming on their own he pulls a string that brings them down. Chuck is crushed under the beds.

Suspender looks at Boxer. "Good morning Boxer."

The woman gets up with only the sheet covering her. Boxer waves goodbye, "see ya sweat cheeks." He ignores Suspender.

Suspender looks at Socks. "Good morning Socks."

Socks pushes his dark hair with purple strips out of his face and grabs a piece of cake. "Don't fuck with me till I've had my morning sugar." Socks shivers from the sweat delicious bite.

Boxer falls asleep with only a blanket to cover him while Socks continues eating.

"Chuck, chuck chuck…"

"Heaven has blessed us with another hint. Behold." She says holding up a dirty piece of paper that says Toilet. They continue to ignore her. She continues as if they were listening. "Lately their have been cases of several humans being eaten by toilets. Humans are most venerable when they endangered in excretions. It is an evil and dastardly deed like no other. It must be the work of ghosts."

"All I need in life is to wake up next to a hot chick with great tits" Boxer says to Socks.

"You really will fuck anything with a vag?" Socks says in between bites.

"Oh stop it with the self righteous bullshit. Every one has a hobby."

"Yah that true, but I'll stick with sugar."

"Don't you ever crave protein?"

"Don't you ever not?"

"Hay it's good for you. Isn't that right Spender?"

"How the hell would I know? Listen you two, if you obscene angels don't want to be dropped, your only choice is to collect Heaven Coins." Suspender pulls out a frame with three Heavenly Coins in it.

Boxer sits there with a finger in his ear while Socks is messing with a cat looking toy. Both not caring at all.

"You are not here to collect women or sugar!" She finishes.

Its silent till Chuck farts at them. He laughs but Boxer punches him then Socks kicks him. They kick him back and forth like a soccer ball. Till they crush him onto a wall. He splatters against the it like an egg.

"So what are you thinking?" Socks ask.

"Ah fuck it lets go."

Boxer changes into a red button up shirt that shows his chest. Socks changes into a dark purple vest with a white shirt underneath and dark black pants. They get into there car See Through. Boxer starts the car and they speed off crashing into anything that's in their way.

"WooHoo. I love how See Through gets us where ever we need to go with some mother fucking style. Get It!" Boxer says stomping down on the gas.

"Oh, my. Look at that flow. You're so good with your hands." Says the woman to the plumber.

"Ah, thanks for hiring me. I'll be back for a quick inspection." He says pointing to his truck. The woman grabs to his arm and pushes her self against him.

"Such a hard working young man… wanna come inside for a drink. I need you to inspect my plumbing…"

Boxer runs into the Plummer's Truck.

"Bingo, found ya." Boxer says jumping out of the car.

"A toilet and a Plummer dude?" Socks questions him. He follows him to the plumber who fallen on the ground.

"Ya, that's him." Boxer sits on top of him and points the gun at his head.

"Are you sure." Socks asks.

"Ya that's the fucker we're looking for. Isn't that right asswhole. Tell me do you feeling lucky punk? Well do ya?"

Boxer shoots him but since he is human it hits him only like they were pellets.

"Ow, ow, ow."

Boxer stops, "I don't think it's him."

"Color me shocked." Socks says.

"Please stop hitting me. I haven't done anything."

They pause. The plumber has bright blue eyes and a handsome face,

"Dude if I wasn't straight I would even do you." Boxer says.

"You're pretty good your self." The woman says stepping next to him.

"You're a hot piece of ass." He says with a smile. "I'll see you soon Socks."

Boxer leaves with the women. Leaving him and the plumber.

"Fucking gross."

Boxer returned satisfied.

"I'm guessing your feeling lucky." Socks says.

"I am and so is that chick."

"What about that plumber dude?"

"I don't know about him but I certainly cleaned her pipes."

"How long have you been waiting to use that one?"

"Fuck it seems like forever."

"Shut the hell up you douche bags and start doing your damn jobs." She throws chuck in frustration as they continue to talk as if they weren't there. "Oh lord grant me the patients. Let's just fucking eat."

The finish and both Boxer and Socks belch.

"Shit that was good." Boxer comments.

"Your curry is unreal!" Socks says taking another bite.

"Ha, that's cause it's black sweaty, you won't ever go back."

"What's for desert? What's for desert? Cocao? Chocolate? Sweat black beans? Black honey?"

"Well I don't give a shit. So I'm going to take one. I'll be in the can if you need me." Box says heading towards the bathroom upstairs.

"Don't let the toilet eat you." Socks laughs.

"Fuck you." Boxer yells back.

He sits and unloads one. He sighs in relief.

The toilet begins to growl and grumble. Then there are two bangs. He sits there for a second wondering if that's it, then something pulls him in. He screams as he is sucked into the toilet.

"WHAT THE FUCK! SOCKS! OH MY GOD! SOCKS!"

"Shut up Boxer. No one wants' to talk to you while your taking a dump. It's disgusting." Socks yells.

Boxer is sucked into the toilet and kicks the ass out of the ghost he is fighting till the toilet coughs him up along with a lot of crap. Boxer walks out covered in shit and angry as hell.

"Okay I get it now" Boxer says standing out in the hallway that is now flowing with shit.

Suspender and Stocking appear out of nowhere.

"Okay you get what now?" Suspender says with a mixing bowl in her hand.

"Maybe the "what's" is the curry." Sock says.

Stocking and Suspender take a deep breath and puke from the stench.

"Oh ya I get it."

"Well we don't get it." Socks says. He pukes from the stench again then continues to eat his cake.

The city then explodes with shit. A huge shit ghost appears.

"What the hell is that thing?"

"It looks like a huge ass scoop of chocolate ice cream."

"Hay, I want some, yummy."

The stench causes everyone to throw up. The ghost storms the city. Soon the cops arrive.

"Freeze shit head."

"Don't move any sudden movements"

They begin to shoot but it is ineffective. It starts to rain shit and they all puke.

"Holy shit, what the fuck are we going to do?" says an older cop.

Suspender clears her throat.

"No offence preacher but Jesus God what is that?"

"Unfortunately you are staring at the brown eye of an evil spirit."

The old fart gasped.

She continued, "The negative energy gathered by all the plumbers that suffocated and died from the stench of clogged ass toilets has manifested itself into a spirit. This powerful ghost gathered all the fecalmater in the city to achieve its poodepoop physical form."

"That's disgusting."

Old fart pukes on Suspender.

"I don't think I can handle anymore bodily functions."

"Suck it up dude, not literally though. Oh shit I'm going to throw up again."

"Please don't tell me prayer is the only option."

"Why the heck would I say that? God ain't even hear right now. Prayer can go to hell man, we got angels. Boxer and Socks your up."

"What are you talking about that walking turdsickle and that Goth dude next to it who obviously has mommy issues?"

"It's time for us to flush the toilet." Boxer says shaking off as much shit as he can.

"Number one that was cheesy, number two you smell like shit." Socks comments.

"How about I buy you a cake each day for the next two weeks and you manage to do this without saying another fucking word."

"As long as what I'm saying now doesn't count I'm in."

"Then let's make this fucker pay for covering me in this shit."

"Let's rock." Socks.

They transform into angels with toga looking cloths and both say, "Oh pitiful shadows lost in the darkness. Oh evil spirit born of those drifting through heaven and earth. May the thunderous powers from the garments of holy delicate maidens strike down upon you with great vengeance and furious anger. Shattering your loathsome impurity and returning you from whence you came. REPENT YOU MOTHER FUCKER!"

Boxer shoots it in the head making a giant whole in its head while stocking cuts the final blow. The ghost explodes. They are rewarded with one heavenly coin.

"Good job angels you got a coin." Suspender says picking the coin up.

"All that for just one?"

"Yah, one closer so quit your bitching"

The bell rings signaling that the ghost is gone. Shit is flying everywhere.

"The evil has been vanquished so rings the bell. At least I'm assuming that's why it's ringing." Garterbelt says with a smile on her face.

Boxer stretches his neck.

"Now keep your promise and go by me that cake, I need sweats stat."

"Ya ya ya. Look I found a little tasty treat for me to." He says pulling a woman cop into his arms.

"What ever you say sweaty you're an angel." She says.


	2. Speed Demon

"Faster! Faster! FASTER!" The woman screams then falls next to Boxer. She makes another X on the wall.

"Are you fucking serious. Faster doesn't mean better." Boxer says sitting up bored.

"Dude you are one hot hard core angel. Boys like you are what keep my motor running."

Boxer rolls his eyes. "How is this even fair? I only came one and I barley felt it. And isn't this supposed to be the other way the round."

"You know you're more like a devil than an angel with a mouth like that."

"Are you fucking serious?" he groans and turns on the TV. He changes it to the news where there is a police chase. "Huh? Wonder what's going on?"

A women anchor that isn't that good looking appears on the screen. "This is an incredible turn of events. If your just tuning in an unman sports car is speeding through the highway."

He laughs and says, "That car might be faster than you."

"No way, mine is the fastest. Wait what are you talking about?"

Boxer then notices a blue Hummer speeding up to the ghost car. Suddenly his phone rings.

He answers, "This is Boxer"

"Where you at?!" Suspender yells through the phone.

"Uhh, I am visiting the elderly at a nursing home." He replies as the woman hugged him from behind. He shook her off and she pouted.

"Don't lie to me your at that immortal hotel!" She yells.

"Shit." His phone beeps signaling another call. "Whoops got another call."

Boxer hears Socks at the other end, "Boxer, are you watching TV?"

"Nope," he replies, "so what's up?"

"I'm chasing down a fucking ghost while you're fucking another whore. Get your fat ass out here!"

"FINE! It's not like this chick is rocking my world or anything." Boxer hangs up and changes into a white t-shirt and regular blue jeans. He puts on a leather jacket.

The woman gets up holding the blanket to cover herself. "I wasn't kidding about my ride. It's the fastest."

"You know, speed if fun but having a little technique never hurt." He grabs the keys. "And thanks for the ride." He takes off towards Socks.

The ghost car flies through the street. The wind causes people to fall and girls with dresses to show a little more than wanted.

It laughs wickedly, "No one can stop me!"

"Come on!" Socks say in frustration. He is close behind. A helicopter overhead is recording the scene below. Socks slams the front end of See Through at the back end of the ghost car.

It laughs, "Trying to catch me are ya? Bring it on ass whole" It slams against against See Through. Socks straightens it out before there can be any damage. "To be honest I don't think you can handle what I'm packing. That means I have a big dick."

They crash into a nearby mall. Boxer sees the explosion of rubble and heads towards it.

The ghost drives past a store nearly missing an old lady complaining about a dress.

"Now one of your sales people talked me into buying this atrocity yesterday they said I looked good but I resembled a side show circus freak in it. Now I want a full refund-" The cops crash into her and the sales clerk jumps for joy.

The ghost laughs again. "Not even close."

Boxer crashes through the ceiling and lands next to the ghost car.

"What's up doughebag? Where the fuck are you off to in such a fucking hurry?" He asks.

"Who the hell cares where I'm off to as long as I get off. Oh yah good one. That means ejaculate pacifically" It laughs again.

"Ya trust me, I know all about the big O. Ask anyone." Boxer says a bit too proudly.

"That's true, he is a giant man whore." Sock comments with a giggle.

The ghost looks at the two boys. "Wait you two know each other."

"Make another crack like that and I'll make sure it's your last." He takes off his boxers. The ghost laughs.

"Ya, take it off!" It crashes into him. They drive through a wall.

The ghost car gets ahead. Boxer looks and can't find his. "Shit, where are they?"

"Where are what?" Socks ask speeding next to him.

"What the fuck is on my face? Who turned off the lights?" The ghost says confused.

"My gun is on your face. Well I mean my boxers."

"Well on the bright side it smells like I'm going really fast.

The ghost licks his boxers. He shudders in disgust.

"That is going to leave nightmares." Socks says.

Boxer growls and then yells over at Socks. "Move over," he jumps into the drivers' seat of See Through. "Let's go See Through." He says stomping on the gas.

"How does it feel to know that you can even turn on guy ghost?" Sock says with a snicker.

"Fuck you. Let's just finish this as fast as possible."

"Bet that's the first time you said that."

"Shut the fuck up."

"You deserve it all because you were late!"

As they get closer to the ghost car the police pass them. They shoot at the ghost with little to almost no affect.

"What the hell, you're totally stealing our jobs you thieves!" Boxer yells.

The ghost shakes off the bullets. "Take this." It makes a sharp turn and starts' doing several 360's causing the cop cars to crash. "Suck it coppers!"

He laughs as the cop cars pile up behind him. The boys scream and maneuver around the falling cop cars nearly missing each one. With luck guns pile up in the back of the car.

Ghost laughs as he speeds near a barricade. "Are you trying to create a barrier? You idiots. Who the hell do you think you are? The army? I'm going to run you over you dip shits."

As he finishes a cop car comes from the side smashing into it. They speed in circles till they come to a complete stop where more cop cars ram into every side. It manages to escape. Boxer and Socks watch as the Ghost flies above then fall at their feet. It was now a small thing.

"Ah life in the fast lane just makes you finish quicker." Boxer says standing over it.

"That means your dead." Socks says more than happy to strike the final blow when Boxer stops him.

"Wait, I need to get my boxers." He reaches down but the thing is already gone.

The ghost laughs as he crawls away. "Suckers. Here I am. I'm in." The ghost crawls to the nearest semi and transforms.

"That's not good." Both Boxer and Socks says at the same time.

"Now you do realize this is all your fault." Sock says hitting his shoulder.

"I'm aware, thanks. But that doesn't mean you can destroy my best pair of boxers." He replies.

"Chuck, chuck, chuck, chuck…"

The both look back and realize all the weapons they have in the back of See Through. They both smile.

The ghost plows through cop cars. "Being made out of fire glass it awesome. Time for payback you fat pigs. And I'm saying that because your cops."

Boxer races towards him with guns in hand and tied to his back.

"Hay fat ass I have an idea, how about you let me help you lighten your load." He continues to shoot at him getting closer and closer. He jumps aiming for his head but hesitates not wanting to hit his boxers. He falls and flies over the semi and lands on his back. When he gets his balance he pulls out two more guns and shoots at the back of his head. Getting out another one he shoots at his propellers. He screams in pain and asks for it to stop. He continues till one of the propellers blow making them turn.

He deposes of the last weapon away and stands on top of it.

When the ghost notices he is done he says, "What's wrong dick angel. Giving up already."

Boxer sits down and watches. Soon the ghost sees Socks standing on the hood while chuck is driving. "No way. Is this a challenge? What are you playing chicken with the roster bitch? I give you credit though. You got some massive balls."

"Bigger than yours dude." Boxer says.

He speeds up as Socks prepares for his strike. Boxer flies back but catches on just in time. As they get closer Socks readies himself and just when it seems they hit Chuck sharply turns at the last second. Stocking sword goes through the truck cutting it in half. It cuts the ghost like butter. It flies over the highway and to a nearby train station.

Socks sighs thinking its all over, "Lets pack up the coins and let's get the hell out of here.

The helicopter comes by with Boxer on it. "Did you destroy my boxers? It hard to find a good pair that fit like that. You owe me a new pair if you did."

Socks ignores him and listens, "Hay we killed the damn ghost the bell should be ringing. That's how it works, right?"

"Ya that's strange."

A distant train whistles. They both groan. The ghost appears with the boxers still on its head.

"Not dead yet. Not even close." He says as they chase him down.

"Are you kidding me? Three rounds of this bullshit?" Socks says.

"Now were talking, I can go all night buddy." He looks down at his boxers. "If only I could get to them." He looks at the people in the helicopter. "Hay, if you can get me down there I'll show you a little more." He says to the female reporter. Her face turns bright red.

Socks drives up onto the top of the ghost train. The helicopter nears the front of the train.

"That's what I'm talking about." He says.

Boxer lets go of the helicopter and falls onto the front of the train.

"Oh fuck yes so close. Oh yes I'm going to blow. Don't stop."

The ghost gains speed making them fall back. He flies past a train station with the wind so strong they fly away. "This speed is amazing, I'm not even using protection. No brakes, pedal to the medal the whole time. Yah baby."

"Shit" boxer says holding onto Chuck whose lip is caught at the front of the train. He smiles at Chuck. "Chuck, have I ever told you how useful you are."

Chuck realizes what he is about to do shakes his head as he asks if he is ready but Boxer already jumps back. They fly into the air till they are forced forward. He catches his boxers just before he passes the train.

"Hay where are you going?" the ghost asks.

Boxer smiles, "don't worry." His boxer turns into a gun. "I'm coming back." He crashes into the front of him crushing his face like glass. He has the gun pointed at him. "Ya I'm done here. It's not me it's you so REPENT MOTHER FUCKER!"

The train explodes and it soon crashes into a dead end sending them flying. Boxer gets in See Through just in time.

The bell rings as they drive away seemingly unharmed.

"How many?" Boxer asks hoping for more than what is coming.

"Three Heavenly." Socks replies.

"Cheep and disappointing" He says angrily.

"Really because you seem to be really enjoying yourself."

"Eh, everyone likes to go fast but without good technique then what's the point." Boxer pulls out his boxers. "Gross. I'm never using these again."


	3. Queen Bee

Boxer and Socks fall through the ceiling again. Boxer is in bed while Socks is on the toilet. They both give Suspender a dark look.

"So nice for you to grace me with your presence today." She says with a straight face.

"This is not what I want to wake up to or how to be woken up." Boxer says pulling up the sheet.

"I'm not stopping what I was doing so you can only be blamed for what your about to smell." Socks says.

She pauses, "I'm going to ignore what and keep on talking. Alright angels we have a grave situation on our hands."

"I bet. What is it? Another shit storm?" Boxer asks combing his hair back with his fingers.

"The only shit storm is coming from your mouth on a daily basis. But I'm prepared for it this time." She says putting her hands behind her back. Chuck pushes out a small old women. She is wearing a formal suit and looks nervous. "Boys meet our new client the principle of Daten's City academic institution. Apparently we only have one."

"Client for what?" Socks asks pulling up his pants and sitting next to Boxer.

"Well the thing is our students are missing. Or rather they are going missing." She said in a fast and twitchy voice. Chuck chomped on the back of her leg. "Ouch. Well some of them are still there. I called the police but they can't figure it out."

"So it must be the work of a ghost." Socks says rolling his eyes.

"It's more than a ghost it's the demon. Oh please save our school." The principle latches onto Boxer's leg. "Oh please help us."

Bower kicks her off angrily. "Great way to ask us like we have a fucking choice."

"I knew you would agree. All right you two. Go wash yourselves and get to high school before that ghost kidnaps anymore students. And remember to not draw attention to yourself. Resist the urge to be yourselves." She says before turning around and leaving with the principle.

It seems like a normal day. There is a couple PMSing while a nerd is getting shoved into a locker and a group of girls are gossiping in the corner. Boxer drives into the hallway with Socks in the passengers' seat. They stop and get out as people around them wonder what is going on. They step out with pimped out uniforms. Socks is wearing dark plaid loose shorts that show off his purple and black striped socks with a black school jacket. Boxer wears a white button up shirt that is not buttoned at the top with a red tie and kakis'.

"Are those celebrities?"

"Are we in a music video?"

Boxer takes off his sunglasses, "we're angels bitches." He says with a smile.

"You do know we are suppose to NOT draw attentions to ourselves, right?" Socks says.

"Who cares?" They walk down as people take pictures of them. "The girls in this school seem easier than the one's in heaven." Boxer says his hand resting on his head.

"That was convincing for a minute I actually thought you knew what school was like up there." Socks says with a snicker.

"I said girls at this school. I wouldn't know that if I actually wasted time in class. Would I?"

"That's true." Socks takes out a map of the school. "Okay let's get this over with. Where should we start?"

As they begin looking they hear a distant scream. "Huh?" they both look up and see someone running towards them.

"What in the fuck? That's not suspicious or anything." Bower says.

"We didn't even have to go looking for trouble." Socks says putting the map in his pocket.

As the person runs past them Socks puts his foot out making the person trip. Boxer gets out his gun and shoots the bees away. They look at the person on the ground. The girl pushes herself up and looks at Boxer.

"H-hot." She says blushing. She had bright red curly hair and bangs that covered her eyes. She was wearing head phones and a big green sweatshirt with strange badges on them. She also had green shorts and green boots that went up to her knees.

They stared at each other for a second then Boxer says, "That all you got." He kicks the bee hive again and she runs around them screaming.

Boxer and Socks snicker. "Hay, here's a thought. Let's take this one home and call it a day." Boxer says loudly.

"Haha, yah. We'll say she's a geeky bee ghost or something. I'm down." They say laughing.

"Help! I can't see and my face hurts." She yells. She runs into one of the football players. She falls on her back and looks up at Barbie. She is sitting atop a chair that is held by a couple football players.

"Oh briefs darling. You're not really running around so carelessly with my bee hive, now are you?" She asks with her legs crossed.

"Ah," Briefs bows on her knees. "Uh I'm so sorry. It's not my fault I swear."

Boxer and Socks kneel next to her. "Aw that was a cute look for you. Why did ya take it off? So hay what the fuck is that?" Boxer asks.

"Ew, gross. I smell douche bag whores." She says plugging her noise. "I don't care who you are or who you want to be but this school belongs to me." She puts her hand to her chest.

Boxer didn't like her. She felt off to him. "You the fucking janitor."

"Ya because we met the principle and she's hotter." Socks says standing up.

"My name is Barbie. You may also refer to me as Queen Barbie, her Majesty or Goddess. Allow them to demonstrate."

"All hail Barbie, her majesty, God." They all yell in unison except for Brief.

"Did she seriously refer to herself as Barbie? Those out dated fetish doll with a zillion lame ass occupations."

"She did and I'm allergic to plastic. Let's get out of here." Socks says motioning for them to leave. Boxer steps on the bee hive as they leave.

"Oh no. No one walks out in the middle of me being worshiped. And how dare you call me plastic"

At the end of the day Barbie Barbie is in the hallway as girls ask how she gets so beautiful. "I guess I was born with it." Boxer drives through the wall and takes off in the opposite direction. Barbie and her followers are left in a pile of dust. Barbie grinds her teeth in anger.

The next day they are in science class. "Look how hot I could be if I were a scientist." Boxer says in a lab coat and goggles. A beaker is next to him. "I think I could turn on a lot of girls just wearing this." Barbie switches beakers. He picks it up and sneezes spilling the contents of it on the person next to him. The guy brakes out in hives. Boxer and Socks laugh at the poor guy and Brief runs to the nurse as Barbie growls in anger.

After that is lunch where a group of girls are crowding Boxer. "Look girls if you want to get a guy you need to try to be sexier. Try striking poses. Like this." He says demonstrating. They copy him and the last one bumps into Barbie. Brief tries to help her up but Barbie pushes her away.

As she is entering the center of the building with her last few followers she sees the janitor change her signs from Barbie to Boxer and Socks. She stomps on the floor and screams, "How am I getting beat by a couple of dudes!"

Down the hallway four ugly girl nerds are clearing there lockers.

"Those Boxer and Socks boys are deleting Barbie from everyone's play list."

"Consider her beta test expired." Says the girl next to her.

"Ya right, I don't know what that means but I'm ready for a new mental image for my locker. Bye bye Barbie." She says throwing the last doll away.

"Girl, it's time for us to eliminate and wipe our hard drives clean of that nasty virus and hail our new royalty." The last girl opens her locker to show it full of Boxer and Socks novelties.

"I know I didn't hear what I think I just heard. Try that again bitches." They slowly turn around.

Boxer and Socks sit in the back of the sex education class room. "Listen up maggots. Your still practically just embryo's, and that means that if you have sex you'll die. I mean it and death is perminate." The professor/gym teacher yells.

Boxer sits on his desk playing with one of his own figures. Socks sits next to him reading a magazine.

"Check this shit out Socks. I've never had my own action figure." He says with a smile.

"You're just in it for the uniform." Socks says turning the page of his magazine.

"So?"

"That's what I like to here." The professor says not noticing the conversation. "Alright you can use one of these." He says handing Boxer a condom.

"Is this gum? Sweat!" He says it and chews it then blows it up.

"What are you guys doing?" Brief asks frantically.

The condom blows up in Boxer face. "Ah, what the fuck?" He says angrily.

"Oh hay geek girl, didn't see you there." Socks says only giving her a glance.

"You got do something all my friends are disappearing, well I mean the people in the halls." She says getting out her phone. She shows them a picture of the locker that had all there faces Xed out.

They go to the locker after class. "What the fuck is that?" Boxer asked seeing it in person.

"This is the work of a ghost there going to kidnap us all and eat our brains." She says still in a panic.

"Their going to do what now? Slow the fuck down I can't understand you." Boxer says.

"You may not believe this but I am and expert in ghost. Plus I got this proton pack for my birthday last year." She explains with a smile on her face.

"Wait that stuff is real?" Boxer and Socks ask in unison.

After school they go to the schools football field and use a ghost detector that resembles a metal detector. It isn't doing anything useful for them.

"I hope who ever gave you that thing kept the receipt because it is either broken as hell or trying to make you look like a stupid nerd." Boxer says following close behind her.

"What exactly were we taking when we decided to follow the ginger freak?" Socks asks.

Brief stops and turns around. "I'm sorry it usually works."

Boxer kicks it in frustration. "Proton pack of shit." Then the thing starts to beep. Boxer smiles, "I knew that would fix it."

Then the thing smokes and blows up. Brief coughs from the smoke.

"Well isn't this just a delight. I was afraid I would never see you two again."

They turn around and see Barbie on the top of the stands surrounded by all the football players and cheer leaders.

"You again. We thought we left you in the trash." Boxer says.

"Were busy at the moment." Socks says.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" She asked with her hands crossed.

"Are you fucking deaf?" Boxer yells. "We don't have time to waste on you."

"Is that so?" She asks with a dark expression. "I wonder if you'll say that after I show you this?" She jumps down landing into a pile of football players who push her back up into the air where she rips off her human flesh to reveal her true form.

"I-It's a real ghost." Brief says then faints.

"Could this be any more fucking predictable?" Boxer asks Socks.

"Nope." He replies. "She's a queen, she's a bee. She's a queen bee we fucking get it."

"I hope you two have something good to bring to teacher Barbie because stupidity results into death in my classroom." Barbie says her voice now low and demonic.

Boxer gets his gun. "This bitch just never shuts the fuck up."

"Let's just get this over with. I need a candy bar." Socks says revealing his swords.

"Who's ready to play?" Boxer yells ready to fight.

"Go!" Barbie screams and the football plays charge at them. They jump up nearly miss getting tackled. Boxer lands and turns to kick the football. It sores above them. They chase after it. Socks hits it back. They chase the ball for a while as Barbie watches from above.

"Why did I think those numb sculls could handle such a simple task?" Barbie says hitting her forehead with her palm.

Brief wakes up and says, "It was all a dream. Thank goodness."

"Heads up!"  
"Huh?" a ball falls in her hand. She looks and sees an army of football players charging at her. She drops the ball and jumps out of the way just before they try to tackle her. She sighs in relief.

Boxer and Socks walk to the pile of guys. Socks pokes them with his sword. "Who are these guys anyway?"

The helmets pop off and turn into giant black bees. Boxer shoots them before they can fly away. "Bee gone." He says blowing the smoke away from the top of his gun. Socks rolls his eyes.

The football players start to wake up. "My head hurts?"

"Was I just a bee?"

"Uh, not exactly. Barbie decided to put bees in your ears to control you." Socks explains.

Barbie growls at them.

"You know what that means?" Both Boxer and Socks says.

"It's extermination day Bee-itches." Boxer says shooting off the bees of the people possessed with them.

Socks cut down any that try to escape. "I'm gonna need you to stop making bee puns." Socks says to Boxer. Boxer laughs.

Socks jumps up cutting another one down.

"Fine. This should finish you off." Barbie turns around and her butt turns into a hive and shoot many more bees. "Get your asses out there and destroy them!"

"Did she just shoot bees out of her but?" Boxer asks. They run towards the bees. The football players hold out Brief to use her as a stepping boost. They jump off her and fly towards Barbie.

Boxer laughs, "just the boost we needed."

Socks uses his swords and spins them cutting through the bees and towards Barbie. Socks gives Boxer one last boost. He shoots through the bees and gets to Barbie. "This is your last sale Barbie." He sticks the gun in her stomach. "REPENT MOTHER FUCKER!"

The ghost explodes and the bell rings for a job well done. Boxer and Socks land softly on the ground. Boxer sticks out his hand just as eight coins fall into his hand. "Cheep bastards."

Socks looks up, "here comes the geeks."

Four people fall to the ground wrapped in what looks like a cocoon.

Boxer looks up and sees the cheer leaders helping one another. "Hmm, I think I need to inspect those girls for any injuries."

Socks looks at the girls then at Boxer, "oh what the hell you earned it."

Boxer smiles, "need any help ladies?" he says running towards them.

Socks glances at Brief, "You gonna join? He'll fuck anyone with boobs and a vag. And from what I can see you have boobs."

Brief shook her head as her face turned red.

Socks shrugged. "Good for you." He walks away before she could as what he meant.

Boxer leaves with a girl having a happy ending.


	4. Sex in the Daten City

The premier for Sex in the Daten City has become a great hit! Featuring Boxer and Socks. The new movie coming out this winter is an adventure with a little romance put in. This new release has gotten Boxer into modeling for big clothing brands. Boxer is now one of the most eligible bachelors in Daten City and he does not let it live down. Boxer is now known as flirtatious and sexy up incoming actor, blah blah blah…" Socks says reading the magazine out loud. He throws the magazine at chuck. "Flirtatious. HA. He fucks anything that will move. Like hell he's 'flirtatious'" he says sticking his tongue out acting as if he will vomit.

He picks up the nearest pudding and shoves a spoonful in his mouth. He shivers and gets on his computer. "I just had a pudding 'gasim."

The bell rings. "geeze, he's hear. Only 10 thousand years later."

Socks gets in Boxer's stretch limbo. They pull away from the crowd of screaming fans.

"How's it going over there Boxer?" Socks ask Boxer who is at the other side of the limbo. He has two girls at his lap, a girl cleaning his shoes and his manager typing away on a computer.

"Just fine, hay remember that time you made a really fucked up commercial."

The manager pulled up the video as Socks face darkened. It had Socks singing. "Glaze my donut, eat my donut. I got a donut for you."

Boxer laughs his ass off while stocking finds Chuck and throws him at boxer. "Shut up doughbag."

"Haha. What ever happened to that job? Didn't you get fired?"

"I wasn't fired I just refused to sell myself cheap, unlike some pricks I know."

"Fine sit there and lick it while I get laid."

"As long as you do it after the premier I don't care what whole you fall into."

They arrive at the premier surrounded by hundreds of fans. They begin there speeches.

Boxer starts, "Thank you so much for coming here tonight." Cheers erupt.

Socks continues, "We have been looking forward to this day for a long time."

"Some might just say we are only in it for the money, but that is only partly true we really do it for you!" he says finishing.

The announcer comes on. "Can you believe it ladies and gentlemen! Sex and the Daten City is already a hit even before it is in theaters. Not to mention this is Boxer's debut film…"

Boxer glares at the announcer then yells. "Hold it, what is this bullshit? Are you suggesting this is my first film? You know who I am, I make movies all the time. This is number two you prick." Boxer whistles. "Bring it Chuck."

Chuck appears with an old VHS tape in his mouth.

"What did you just pull out of your ass?" Socks asks.

"Oh like you don't know." Finally he pries the tape from his teeth and tosses him. "Here play this. And next time do some mother fucking research."

The tape begins with Boxer sitting on a couch smoking. He takes a deep breath in as sirens play in the background. A girl sits next to him and throws her arms around his neck. They kiss. The girl starts unbuttoning her blouse and they soon figure out it is a porno.

"Not many actors can handle that kind of role but I knew I had what it takes." Boxer said as the film continued and the audience watched in horror.

Security gather money to keep the audience quiet about the film but the damage is already done.

Boxer continued to gloat not fully realizing what he had just done. He continued all the way back to the green room till one of the people stopped the movie. Socks sat next to him with a dark expression.

"Dah fuck, put it back on. We were just to the good part." Boxer yelled.

The manager burst in. "What the hell were you thinking? Your debut film is a porno!?"

"WHAT!?" Boxer yelled in confusion. "Serious. It was a direct-to-video. No wonder I haven't won an Oscar yet."

"That's not the point! There is a bigger problem!"

"What was my acting bad?"

"No you were very good. But that's beside the point!"

"What the fuck is the point then?"

"The fucking point is you have three brain cells left and there all fighting for your attention. Why would you play your porno during the movie premier? Now our movie will get canceled!" Socks says finally at his breaking point.

The manager whispers to Boxer, "and I hate to be the barer of bad news but leaking sex tapes is known as career suicide."

It seems to finally hit him. "So it's over. No more celebrity lifestyle. No more women in lines just to see me? It will all be over?" Boxer says finally cracking. "I fuckin hate it here."

Socks sighs then drinks his tea. "It's all over because of you."

"Wait I have an idea." Suddenly losing his dark mood.

"I'm sure that one hurt." Socks mumbled.

Boxer grabbed the tape and shoved it in Chucks throat. He chomped on it until there was nothing left. Boxer patted his hands satisfied. "Easy as pie. It's like it never happened."

The group is left in aw.

"Are you fucking retarded. Someone already taped that thing. It's already on the internet. Dammit can you be any more stupid?" Socks gets up. "How fucking slow can you be? God did not design you for thinking. Either that or he put you brain in you dick."

Boxer snapped, "I don't know what the fuck your trying to say but I know it reeks of ass hole you ass hole. You're just fucking jealous. You just watch me get women left an right were you can't even get a fucking dog to come near your ass." He pauses. "No need to worry though this will be all over soon. As long as I can get my group to clean-?" Boxer stops as he sees no one there. "What the fuck, where did they go?"

"Guess the ass that gets women left and right was too much for them. They left before you ruined there careers too." Socks looks at the screen with their movie name on it. "I mean why give up porn for a good movie career."

Boxer leans in. "Maybe I over reacted."

"Over reacted is an understatement."

"You are the coolest, and awesome little fuck in the world." Boxer hugs Socks.

He sighs. "get your gay ass off me. I'll help already."

They start See Through and drive into the city.

"You're the best brother ever."

"Save it. I'd rather you show me you gratitude in sweats."

"Of course. You can have all the cakes, puddings, and candies that money can buy as long as we get rid of all the tapes. So what's the plan?"

"I have a list of buyers from your porn site."

"You are the best."

"And don't you forget it."

They drive off into a small neighbor hood. They burst into a small one room apartment with a man in it watching the film. "Holly shit." The man grabs the nearest pillow to hide himself.

"Ew. Got nerd jerking off to me."

"No wait I wasn't-"

"How does it feel knowing you can turn on men too."

"Shut the fuck up." Boxer pulled out his gun and stuck it to the creeps head. "If you say one word about this I'll blow your brains out. Got it!"

He nodded.

"Any coppies?" Socks asked. The man shook his head.

They destroyed the tape and headed off to the next stop. It was an average home with two kids. They came crashing in. It turns out the mother purchased it. They left with the father not too surprised. The kids got a couple of signed t-shirts.

The next stop is an adult movie store.

"Seriously. I'm worth more than two fucking bucks."

Socks giggles. They get more leads and destroy more copies all over the world where Boxer is able to fuck on different counties and joins the mile high club. More than once. They cruise all over the world destroying all the tapes. They finish up in Alaska and find out the last one is out in space.

They crash to earth and Boxer looks at the tape.

"You know it wouldn't be horrible to keep just one." Boxer says softly.

"It was your film debut. Give it to me. I'll keep it safe." Socks says half heatedly.

"If there is anyone I can trust this with it is you. Thank you."

They get back to earth and start everything from scratch. They end up at the premier with the same speech.

"…we do this for you. Our fans." Boxer finishes.

"Isn't that great ladies and gentlemen. This also marks Boxer's on screen debut. Isn't that right."

"Yes thank you." He said fast enough so they can move on.

"Fantastic. It also comes to no surprise this is also Socks first film."

"Thank you doing this film has been-" Socks is cut off.

"Ya about that, we started off as co-stars but then we realized that he wasn't the thing we were going for. He brought moddy and dark energy so I am proud to say that we cut out every scene that he was in."

Socks shook violently. He walked off stage and grabbed his laptop. As Boxer was finishing his speech Socks downloaded the sex tape on the internet.

"There now the whole world can see you in a whole new light." Socks said with a wicked smile on his face.

Brief clicked on a link sent to her. She fell out of her chair when she saw it was Boxer's porno. She shivered on the ground with a bright red face and whispered. "S-so that's what it looks like."


End file.
